As I Get Older, I Still Welcome Change

Bond Street, London. All Wrapped Up for Christmas. Photo by me.

I remember my grandfather voting in the South African elections of 1994. He voted for the new South Africa, one of inclusion and equality and people being governed by the majority. He was very old at the time and an immigrant to South Africa, but he believed in change. He was able to stay mentally fit and enquiring all his life. He was a lesson to anyone getting on in years who makes excuses about being 'set in their ways' or those of us who forgive the older generation for being racists and homophobes because they grew up in a different time. He knew right from wrong and continued to learn about the things he didn't know. As a result, life-long learning has always been a pillar in my own life. I believe that it keeps you relevant, it keeps you young, and it makes sure you never get 'set in your ways'. Sure, it's comfortable there in your ways. And after all the years on earth, you've earned the right to be a bit comfortable and less curious. I'm just not made that way. I will always welcome learning and change in my life, no matter how old I get.

And as a result I have introduced a whole new set of changes, as I explore my fifties. Many of you know that I have been speaking for years about moving back to the UK, planning for a post-70 retirement, which includes the ability to 'swallow' between London and Cape Town. Some of you even know that I actually made the move a few months ago. To be fair, I kept it fairly low-key, just until I was settled and knew I was staying. So here I am now. Based in London again, setting up a new phase of my life all over again, everything starting from scratch. (I mean scratch-ish since it's only been 11 years since I left.)

I Live Here Now. Again. St Paul's Cathedral from Over the River. Photo by me.

Change is terrifying. It's especially so when you are older and you don't have the exhilaration of youth that makes everything an opportunity, exciting and a big adventure. I have really noticed, like never before, how brave I have had to be - consciously so - in order to actually make this happen. And yet, I can't comprehend not doing so. I can't imagine having dreams and plans for my future, and not doing whatever it takes to make them happen - even if it means sacrifices and overcoming fear. Of course, now that I am older, I also know how to put a back-up plan in place, how to fund such a change, and how to keep it all a little bit on the DL so that you can change your mind, if it all gets too big and scary. You definitely get smarter about these things.

But, even so, it's still massive. I also realised that my experience of leading ecommerce retail was compromised in the UK by my lack of experience with marketplaces (ahem, by which I obviously mean Amazon) so I needed to find an opportunity with my job hunt, to get that experience as urgently as possible, even though it meant going outside my comfort zone of fashion retail. More changes. I start my new job on the first Monday of the new year and I am obviously terrified of that too. But I will walk in on my first day, determined to do my best and learn as much as possible. How utterly thrilling an opportunity, right?

The Museums of South Kensington, London. On a Crisp Winter Day. Photo by me.

And so, whilst I welcome these changes - well I bloody initiated them, so I'd better - I am not immune to the fear and the sadness that comes with change. I am not unaware that I have the opportunity and privilege of being brave and bold and curious enough to do all of this. And I definitely have moments when I wonder why the hell I gave up my genuinely happy, loving, beautiful life in Cape Town to embark on a life of change. I mean I was so comfortable in my ways there. And then I remember (or someone reminds me): My discipline of learning. My innate curiosity for life. My need to explore and question. My desire to stay relevant and cool. All of these things need to be fed. Good and bad. And making sure that change is a constant in my life ensures that I will never mentally get old.

The Royal Albert Hall, London. Concerts and Exhibitions Fuel my Soul. Photo by me.

I know many of you are contemplating change in your life too, and I wish you all the bravery and boldness in the world for these decisions. My best advice is plan extremely well so that you lose very little if the unknown makes things tricky - and be open to all the benefits you will gain from embracing change. In the end life has to be lived. It has to present more challenges and opportunities than same-old - else we will get bored, go stagnant and exist in stasis forever. No one is happy in that place. So take the step if you can. Have an open heart for all the people and places and jobs and homes and opportunities that you will encounter through your life. Be humble and curious and open. And above all, be brave about change. It's the only way to find happiness over and over again. Good luck with all of it.